Monday, 23 February 2009

One Woman's Story

I've sometimes remarked on this blog how immensely privileged I've been to meet some of the finest and most courageous people on the planet.

This is one of them.

She's "Deep Stealth" - having your house firebombed when you got outed will do that - so I can't say how or where I know her from, nor when we last met. She's my friend though, that's enough.


Bad hair days said...

A heartbreaking story. But it was stories like hers that kept me from transitioning, having developed an anxiety disorder wich kept me from going the official ways. That cost me at least 10 years of my life :-(

Anonymous said...

Wow! I tried to comment on the Salon post, but I'm not a Salon member. So, please just send her my, "Wow! What a moving story!" comment.

I'm imagining how different her life would have been if gender had been a non-issue with those who rejected her (just as if sexual orientation were a non-issue for those who reject lesbian and gay people).

I'm glad (and amazed) that she was able to move to another country and raise enough money to get the surgery and now have a happier life.

All through the story, I was wondering if this would be a good story to print and show to the people who say, "I believe God made people male and female ..." I'm glad this story has a happy ending (and, glad the two of you were able to meet).

Zoe Brain said...

I did leave a comment, but she decided to delete it.

She's Deep Stealth, and there's too many connections between us. She'd prefer it if I didn't comment further.

It's a pity, she omitted much of her story. But as the details might possibly help identify her, it will remain untold.

She's not the only person whose life I could destroy if I said too much. "We walk among you" as was said in TransAmerica. I'm part of the 1 in 10 who are not Stealth.

Anonymous said...

This is off-topic, but what do I do about big shoulders? I was asking because my shoulder-width is 45 cm and they look sort of bulky. Will hormones help at all with that?

Zoe Brain said...

agp?- no, not noticeably. HRT can make cartilage thinner and more supple, so small changes in height and shoe size can occur. But your 45cm shoulders might become 44.5cm at best.
The muscle though will shrink, so the visual effect may be greater than you think, The answer though is basically no.

Anonymous said...

Thank you. One of the good things is that my hips are not that much narrower, so could that visible change help? Basically, it looks still like I am bulky in the upper body and the hormones will change that?

I was also asking about the voice, which we had talked about, and it's not going well. My voice is masculine, but I don't want to pay for a speech therapist as that'll make things cost more. One thing I don't have any clue on is how do I get in touch with local transpeople?

I want to start electrolysis, but it's expensive. What are some ways I can pay for it?

Bad hair days said...

Hallo A.

Don't think to hard about your shoulders - passing is heals up.
For help with you voice look at CandyFLAs phantastic series at youtube:

Anonymous said...

I don't know too much about the efficacy of these "female voice" things--how about when an MtF screams as a reaction to something? Will she sound male or female and with what kinds of practice?

Bad hair days said...

Well it works...
A friend of mine gone that way and while we played wii tennis gave a good demonstration on that ;-)
I'm still in training.