In WTFs/m
The technical name is the principle of least astonishment.
Q = T/W
Q = Quality
T = Time (in minutes)
W = WTFs
Sunday, 12 October 2008
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Intermittent postings from Canberra, Australia on Software Development, Space, Politics, and Interesting URLs.
And of course, Brains...
17 comments:
You're fortunate that you live in Australia:
https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5133406188107963638&postID=458170546625617096
I like it.
I think though that if there was an "Ethnic Uprising" that most people would just yawn. I mean, we're Irish, and Chinese, and Patagonian, and what-have-you. But we're Australian, even though 1 in 3 were not born here.
I wasn't.
There's a song that encapsulates this. We don't make a big song-and-dance about it, we take it for granted. It's only when there's an exception that we notice.
I came from the dream time, from the dusty red soil plains,
I am the ancient heart - the keeper of the flame,
I stood upon the rocky shore, I watched the tall ships come,
For forty thousand years I'd been the first Australian.
We are one but we are many
And from all the lands on earth we come,
we share a dream,
And sing with one voice,
I am, you are, we are Australian.
I came upon the prison ship bound down by iron chains
I cleared the land, endured the lash and waited for the rains.
I'm a settler, I'm a farmer's wife on a dry and barren run
A convict then a free man, I became Australian.
I'm the daughter of a digger who sought the mother lode
The girl became a woman on the long and dusty road
I'm a child of the depression, I saw the good times come
I'm a bushy, I'm a battler, I am Australian.
We are one but we are many
And from all the lands on earth we come,
we share a dream,
And sing with one voice,
I am, you are, we are Australian.
I'm a teller of stories, I'm a singer of songs
I am Albert Namatjira, and I paint the ghostly gums
I am Clancy on his horse, I'm Ned Kelly on the run
I'm the one who waltzed Matilda, I am Australian.
I'm the hot wind from the desert, I'm the black soil of the plains
I'm the mountains and the valleys, I'm the drought and flooding rains
I am the rock, I am the sky, the rivers when they run
The spirit of this great land, I am Australian.
We are one but we are many
And from all the lands on earth we come,
we share a dream,
And sing with one voice,
I am, you are, we are Australian.
We had a "White Australia" policy once. We... outgrew it. To go back to those days would be like wearing a diaper again. A soiled one.
Please help! I think I could be autogynephiliac, but I think it's BS! But a lot of seems to make sense, but I don't know if I should identify with it! What should I do! How would I be looking at things wrong?
autogynephiliac? - The most important question is, do you have gender dysphoria or not?
AGP isn't complete BS. But it affects cisgendered people too, and is more of a quirk than a medical condition. See Dr Tracy O'Keefe's study on a mixed group of male and female patients showing signs of AGP.
Many of the "symptoms" of AGP are, when you look at it, complete BS. The implication that engineers and computer scientists are all autogynaphiliac beggars belief. Yes, there are common patterns, but just because the patterns have been identified and really exist doesn't mean they're signs of AGP - or any other syndrome either. AGP in the cisgendered has no correlation with these patterns, they appear to be properties of being TS rather than AGP, and neurobiological theory predicts such patterns.
If you are gender dysphoric, then the thing to do is see a gender specialist. Even the proponents of fanatic AGP theory don't see it as a disqualification from transitioning, just that the odds of success are lower.
Rather than worrying about "box" to put yourself in, try investigating first. That's what you're doing, asking questions. But please try to find out what "is" rather than what "should be" to start with.
Once you know where you are, then you can then think about what *you* would like to be, and get help in moulding yourself in that direction. Really, the only one who can make that call is you.
I'm sorry, I'm not a psychologist or psychiatrist, and have little knowledge of paraphiliac symptoms. Not even the common and socially acceptable ones like foot fetishes or fascination with garters that many men have.
I don't know if it is a paraphilia. There something about a dress or skirt that is different from pants. I want to be able to go out in a dress or a skirt, but that isn't transsexuality, that's cross-dressing or AGP. I mean, it isn't all about it, of course. I hate the fact I sound male, and have male parts, and have for as long as I can remember. But there are these positive aspects too, that I understand as not being transsexuality, but rather cross-dressing or AGP.
There's a joke that may apply:
"What's the difference between a cross-dresser and a transsexual?"
"Oh, about 5 years."
Many people are obviously TS, and a diagnosis easy within 15 minutes. Some are not, it may take years. And some have gender identities that may not have consolidated, even at a late age. They may never do, and the person may be stuck in a "gender twilight zone".
This is not such a bad thing, by the way. Being "part time" and avoiding hormones and surgery is greatly to be desired, if that's all that's needed. It usually isn't though, the condition is often progressive.
So please hie thee hence to a professional.
How do they know so quick?
I'm confused. This desire to wear dresses and skirts and sound feminine precludes transsexuality, right?
autogynephiliac?, I sometimes almost wonder how "they" could not "know so quick," in this age of Google. But if not being transsexual is emotionally important to you for some reason, you can still find ways to deny it, hide it from yourself, or rationalise it away for quite a while.
Your other question confuses me. If transsexuality is identifying with members of the "other" sex, wouldn't that preclude a lot of natal women from qualifying as members of their own sex?
Well, it's about wanting to wear dresses and skirts. Women don't really care about it all that much. They don't look at other women and think how attractive they are, they become jealous instead. Because of that, they can't be autogynephliac. What do you mean when you say how they could not know so quick?
autogynephiliac?, I have to disagree. I do know a number of women who "don't really care about it all that much," but I also know others who do care about how they dress, and enjoy wearing dresses and skirts when the occasion calls for it or the mood strikes. And I know at least one who specifically quit smoking because she didn't want to "sound like a man."
I also know from talking to born-female friends that most of them do look at other women and think how attractive they are--some of them, it only makes them jealous or envious; others, not all of them lesbian, have a reaction similar to what straight men have. Angelina Jolie in particular seems to elicit the reaction, "I'd switch teams for her," from my straight women friends.
I've also had one (born) woman tell me directly, unsolicited, that she is really turned on by the fantasy of being more "sexy like those girls in centerfolds or pornos," and she and another friend have admitted to being turned on by secretly wearing sexy underwear under their everyday clothes.
As for what I meant about "how they could not know so quick," I think I was just confused about who you meant by "they"--I was assuming we were talking about the transsexual, but now I'm thinking maybe you (and Zoe?) meant a psychologist or psychiatrist attempting to diagnose the transsexual. I won't take sides on that because I don't think it's really a meaningful question, given the current basis of such diagnoses.
Hi autogynephiliac? et al.
When the point is made to me that crossdressers and some transexuals tend to dress in rather old-fashioned and fetishised styles of clothing and that somehow deligitimises their claim to femaleness or womanhood beause it is not what most women currently wear I find it fairly easy to explain.
After spending years denying one's femininity, whether it's a portion of ones identity or the core of it, then it should come as no surprise that such a person might have a preferance for the least masculine womens clothing available. After all there's often not a lot of difference between some womens tops and pants and guys ones (I know, I've been getting away with mixing those up for years) so it makes sense that someone needing to express themselves in the way they'd been denied for years would go to the extremes first, the stuff least like the guys stuff.
After spending years finding oneself ugly and unattractive as a man (or at least missing that vital femininity) as many do then seeing oneself looking more like a woman should be expected to elicit for many a stronger form of the confidance and arousal that many a cis person who looks in the mirror after getting ready for a date etc experiences, pleased to find themselves looking handsome or sexy in the sex/gender they were born in.
The denial and repression makes these things more strong, more exaggerated.
And as would be expected many people find that settles down over time. Many crossdressers as they get older become more comfortable in womens slacks then a skirt other than for special occassions as the pent up energy of years of denial slowly gets released through feminine expression and self acceptance. They still dress like women but more inline with current trends and fashions in their age-group.
And of course style is always personal, some women always wear skirts no matter their age cis and trans alike.
There are plenty of people who find themselves in grey areas between transexual and crossdresser. Often its a matter of it taking time to undo repressed feelings a little at a time, adjusting to that, then a little more as a journey of self discovery that can take years to find the point of comfort and balance sometimes see-sawing between different expectations and catagories until they find whats truly right for them.
As for women and clothes and women looking at other women, I've been invited to a couple of lingerie-sales parties by lesbian friends and despite quite a few being 'butch' and 'bull-dykes' (their own terms for themselves) I was most definately not the only one buying lace stuff nor the person buying the most lace stuff either.
Catagories are vague averages at best. Real people are much more complicated and intricate and filled with apparent contradictions and dichotomies.
So my advice autogynepliac? is to go with what currently makes you happiest. Take your time with any decision your unsure about especially the permanant ones. Explore yourself fully and expect your feelings on things to change and evolve over time too.
Just keep ethical (consenting adult humans and all that stuff) and then it doesn't matter what pushes your buttons or what frees your soul sexually or what you enjoy.
Thank you. I'm ordering a sailor fuku that I'm going to dress up as for Halloween, with my friends. I want my voice to sound feminine though and I'm worried about it. What should I do?
autogynephiliac?, the advice I've heard is to practice singing along with female singers. I don't know if there is much you can do in the couple weeks before halloween though.
I can't help too much, passing for me seems random, I've passed over the phone when not trying and visually in guy clothes some days and not at all on others.
Still I'd suggest you search on the net for what tips on vocal passing you can find, try some of the online crossdressing community forums (especially ones with a mix of people on them) where you can get a whole host of good practical and tested advice and just try your best and be forgiving of yourself too.
Undoing the learnt male behaviourisms and making up for the effects of testosterone is often not easy so give yourself permission to struggle and time to improve gradually so you don't get too distraught if you don't get the results you need quickly.
autog? - You may want to join the VoiceTS Yahoo group.
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=aSoGJQkKDYk
How would this work?
http://jp.youtube.com/watch?v=s7qSJ19f_QU&feature=related
AGP? - yes, that is the recommended way to do it. That video is amazing though. I went to a speech therapist back in Dec 05, and I couldn't get my previous voice back!
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